There has been a wide berth of white space here in this little corner of the internet. I can list off a number of excuses to account for my silence. But if I am honest with myself (and you), I must admit that this writing brings things out in me that I prefer to keep buried deep beneath my line of sight. Insecurities, doubt and lack of purpose wrestle with each other, trying to gain traction and halt my movement forward.
Because checking numbers and stats, followers and “likes” can make this “comfortable behind-the-scenes-girl” very uncomfortable.
I recognize the comparison game that creeps in as I watch more polished, purposeful, high profile blogs flourish and reach a broad audience. I can only imagine my words stretching that far.
We women have a special knack for comparing ourselves to each other, don’t we?
Do you find yourself comparing your marriage? Your kids achievements? Your job progression? The scope and reach of your ministry? Facebook, social media and the blog world can shake the most self-confident person loose.
I find myself slipping down this very dangerous path, and it paralyzes me.
Then I find these words hidden in a passage of Scripture I have read a hundred times before.
I read about one whose life was meant to be lived in the shadows of one bigger and better. A life with the sole purpose of shining light on the One coming after him. “He must become greater, I must become less.” (John 3:30)
John the Baptist, the forerunner for Jesus Christ. The one who prepared the way for Jesus Christ. In his lifetime, he never performed a miracle and he watched his ministry dim as Jesus’ life and mission shone brighter.
What did John the Baptist think of his diminishing in order for Jesus’ purpose to be fulfilled? Did he fight to keep his voice heard above the rest? Did he quit when he realized all of his followers were now following Jesus?
Someone approaches John and asks him this question:
“Rabbi, that man who was with you on the other side of the Jordan-the one you testified about-well, he is baptizing, and everyone is going to Him.” (John 3:26)
Jealousy, fear of losing position and influence could have overwhelmed John.
But it didn’t.
He was secure in who Christ made Him to be and for what purpose He served.
To this John replied, “A man can receive only what is given him from heaven.” (John 3:27)
What platform has the Lord given you to point others to Him?
It may be highly visible and attract hundreds or even thousands. But it also may be one or two little ones at your feet, smearing peanut butter on your pant leg. Your workplace? Neighbors? You child’s teacher?
It matters not the size of the platform, but only our willingness to be faithful to that which He gives us.
Is what I’m doing pointing others to the Savior of the world?
When our lives are in unison with God’s purposes, we are simply road signs pointing to our heavenly Father.
At the end of the day, what really matters most is what our heavenly Father thinks.
Numbers fluctuate, comments turn negative, and friends can sometimes “de-friend” you.
Go in search of the applause of heaven, rather than the temporary applause that this earth offers.
“We fix our eyes not on what’s seen. But on the unseen. What’s seen is temporary. What’s unseen is eternal.” (2 Corinthians 4:18)
Can we say at the end of our lives, “With what you gave me, I did my best to make you know.”
With that spoken, my prayer for each of us is to one day enter the gates of heaven and hear, “Well done, thy good and faithful servant.”