My memory is skewed. Because it was not that long ago that Mother’s Day brought with it pain and tears because of what I could never have again.
I remind myself to remember. Because the loss is part of the story.
And the empty makes the full all the more full!!!!
Because there were years, and I mean years, of “bruised-knees” praying.
Because those pink-lined pregnancy tests always did end up in the trash.
And the doctor appointments filled my calendar, and my medical file bulged and Doctor’s clamored to see what they had “never seen before.” And none could figure out how it was possible I even had one little guy sitting at home. A miracle they called it.
But all the while, I heart-ached for what they were telling me I could never have again.
Surrender came not long before that Navy Hospital in Italy. The Doctor, who seemed more like a friend than my ob/gyn, explained my percentages of having another child. And she monitored and watched as my body lost our last.
But all the while, God was making another way.
I experienced birthing pains of a different sort…because don’t let anyone tell a mother-through-adoption that they don’t experience birth pains…….oh they do and it hurts. That waiting and paper trail and so many other people holding the strings to when and where and who your baby will be. So we blindly trusted.
And He made our family in a way I could not clearly see.
But adoption is just part of our miracle story.
Because four months later, that same Doctor from Italy finds me again in Virginia. And that test popped pink and the Doctor smiles big and rejoices with me. Because we have a new little girl at home and now another is on the way. And she asks me if she can share my story. Because she walked through the loss with me and now sees my quiver (or mini-van) full!!!!
And I love how our God can even amaze a mass of Doctor’s.
So I celebrate this baby’s birth seven years ago today!!! Because I don’t have to look further than my kitchen table to give testimony that miracles do happen even today!!!
“This God–his way is perfect; the word of the LORD proves true; he is a shield for all those who take refuge in him. ” Psalm 18:30